Yall right mate we have some cool jokes for you
GREEN JOKES
Q: Why are environmentalists bad at playing cards? A: They like to avoid the flush.
Q: What did the Tree Hugging hottie say to the guy in the SUV? A: "Turning off your Engine, gets my motor humming"
Q: What's the name of the new Tom Cruise eco-thriller? A: Mission Compostable!
Q: Why do all eco-friendly consumers love T&A? A: Because they think it stands for Trees and Air Quality!
Q: What did the environmentalist get when he sat down for too long on an iceberg? A: Polaroids!
Q: Why doesn't a Sustainability Consultant look out the window in the morning? A: It gives him something to do in the afternoon!!
Q: Why does a Time Magazine survey state only 85% of Americans think global warming is happening? A: The other 15 percent work for the oil industry!
Q: How many climate sceptics does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None. It's too early to say if the light bulb needs changing.
Q: How do Prius owners drive? A: One hand on the wheel, the other patting themselves on the back
Q: How does President Bush plan on fighting record high temperatures? A: By switching from Fahrenheit to Celsius!
Q: What kind of plant grow on your hand? A: Palm tree.
Q: Why did the American Greenpeace activist throw out all his spray cans? A: "Because they were a bunch of aerosols"
Q: What does a tree drink? A: Root Beer.
Q: Why are pirates so eco-friendly? A: They always follow the three arrrrrrrs.
Q: Did you hear the one about the aluminium recycling plant? A: It smelt!
Q: How do trees settle a disagreement? A: They sign a tree-ty.
Q: Did you hear the one about the recycling family of triplets? A: Polly, Ethel and Ian
Q: What did one tree say to the other? A: Are you a Sap!
Q: What lies between a good recycler and a bad recycler? A: Oregon
Q: What is the difference between a person and a tree? A: One is illegal to hit with an ax!
Q: What can the climate do that weather can't do with a tree? A: Climb it.
Q: What is the most dramatic scene in Al Gore's film "An Inconvenient Truth!"? A: When the glacier melts and they find more hanging chads!
Q: How do you know your a bad recycler? A: You give the recycle bins to your kids to use as toboggans.
Q: What happened after President Bush said "global warming is happening much quicker than he thought"? A: His advisers pulled him aside and explained it was springtime!
Q: How are Republicans planning to reduce record heating bills this winter? A: Global Warming!
Q: What do loggers eat in the forest? A: Mac and trees.
Q: Why did the leaf go to the doctor? A: Because it was feeling green.
Q: What are the benefits to Joan Rivers extensive plastic surgery? A: When she dies they can just put her in the recycle box!
Q: How do oil companies deal with with tanker spills? A: Slick lawyers.
Q: What do you get when you cross an environmentalist with direct action? A: Arrested!
Q: How bad was the BP Gulf Oil Spill? A: So bad they started drilling for water!
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