JOES JOKES

 Hello ladies and gents this is the Viking telling you that today we are talking about 

Chili Jokes and Puns

We are thinking about making chili for Christmas Eve.

We're starting a new tradition called 'silent but deadly night'.

Can you tell me why the Irish only put 239 beans in their chili?

well me boy, one more would be "twofarty".

A homeless man walks by a bar...

He sees a man sitting in front of a steaming bowl of chili. And the homeless man is so hungry he walks inside the bar and tells the man he's very hungry. The man at the bar just shoves the chili over to the homeless man and nods. The homeless man is surprised but starts eating right away, as he gets to the bottom of the bowl he sees a dead mouse. The homeless man throws up the chili back in the bowl. The man at the bar says "I did the same thing ten minutes ago".

Why did the Chihuahua put on a jacket?

Because it was a chili dog!

Why did the chicken skip a track on his Red Hot Chili Peppers CD?

To get to the Otherside.

So this bell pepper spots a jalapeño walking on the streets and wants to know why he's all wrapped up in layers of clothes. "Hey," he says, "hey, aren't you a bit hot?"

"No," says the jalapeño, "I'm a little chili"

A boy runs into his parent's bedroom at 3am and says, "Dad! Dad! There's a burglar in the kitchen eating all of mom's leftover chili!"

The dad replies, "Go back to bed, son. We'll bury him in the morning."

What do you call a weenie dog in a snow bank?

a chili dog!

What will the "Red Hot Chili Peppers" become when they die?

Ghost Peppers.

The woman and her chili.

A man walks into a bar and notices a woman sitting at a table. In front of her on the table is a full bowl of chili. Since the man is very hungry, he asks her if he can have her chili. She agrees, giving him the bowl. The man starts to quickly put spoonfuls into his mouth. As he gets to the end of the chili, he sees a dead rat at the bottom. This causes him to vomit back into the bowl.

In response, the woman said: "Yep, that's about as far as I got too."

And as always have a chilled day from the Viking