Hello ladies and gents this isi the Viking telling you that today we are talking about
KIWI JOKES
I recently went on a vacation to New Zealand. I had an amazing time there but everyone kept pointing out my religion. Every person I ran into said "hebrew".
What did one kiwi statue say to the other kiwi statue?
Stat'chu bro?
Did you hear about the amazing mountain ranges in Southern NZ?
They are Remarkable.
A bad kiwi uber driver drove all the way from NZ to Australia.
He only got 2 stars.
You Know You're A Kiwi When
You end most of your sentences by saying "eh"
When you hear "sweet as" you know it has nothing to do with taste.
The correct name for flip flops is Jandal
The beehive actually has no bees in it.
You are 100% sure that the pavlova is a kiwi creation.
You can't trust Aussies because of the underarm bowling incident.
You know that whakapapa sounds like a swear word but actually isn't.
A dairy is something that actually has very little to do with dairy.
Jokes About New Zealanders
Q: What do you call a Kiwi with a hundred lovers?
A: A shepherd.
Kiwi scientists have made a breakthrough discovery and discovered 2 new uses for New Zealand sheep?
For both meat and wool.
Q: I asked a kiwi how many sexual partners he had had...
A: He fell asleep counting.
Q: Whats the difference between a smart Kiwi and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters
Q: Why does New Zealand have some of the fastest race horses in the world?
A: Because the horses have seen what they do with their sheep.
And as always have a chilled day from the Viking
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